


when the night gets dark

by trinketchu



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Character Analysis, Cuddling & Snuggling, Gilmore finally gets some rest, Multi, basically Gilmore joins polymachina, because I have no impulse control, but the rest are there too, for Gilmore mostly, hints of Vax'ilmore, mostly centered around Gilmore and Vax, post Marquette
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-09
Updated: 2016-09-09
Packaged: 2018-08-13 23:37:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,666
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7990426
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/trinketchu/pseuds/trinketchu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He didn’t have the energy to keep people safe and still be Glorious Gilmore, so all that was left was Shaun, tired and struggling and just a little bit broken like the rest of them. </p>
<p>Gilmore finally lets himself be taken care of.</p>
            </blockquote>





	when the night gets dark

**Author's Note:**

> title from "Take a Break" from Hamilton

After they returned from Marquette, Vox Machina didn’t immediately notice something was wrong. It was a calm, cloudy day with a few children playing in the street. As they reached the castle, however, a ripple flowed through the sky, the arcane barrier seemingly fluctuating. The pulsing lasted for several seconds before fading into stillness, the barrier clear and seamless once more. It took only seconds for them to come to the unanimous decision to check on Gilmore.

  
They made a quick stop first, running to Kima and Allura’s home to see if she had returned. Allura opened the door, still wearing her worn traveling clothes.

  
“Ah, you’ve returned as well, then?” She welcomed them, warm but exhausted. “Did you find the vestige?”

  
Vex was quick to cut in “Yet, but did you see the sky a moment ago? The barrier is failing. We’re going to check on Gilmore now, but we were hoping you could take over holding up the barrier for the time being.”Allura looked over Vex’s shoulder as another ripple, smaller this time, passed through the arcane barrier.

  
“I knew I shouldn’t have been gone so long,” she said, walking back into the house to settle in one of their chairs. “Go talk to Gilmore and make sure he’s alright; I’ll focus on taking control of the barrier.”

  
So Vox Machina set off down the road, passing small, newly opened shops and decrepit homes on their way to Gilmore’s temporary residence. They had to knock several times at Shaun’s door, growing concerned after the second and third knock went unanswered. Finally, after the fourth knock, a weak “Come in,” sounded from inside. Vax entered first, swiftly scanning the visible rooms for Gilmore, and the rest of Vox Machina followed behind him. They found him slumped in an armchair in the sitting room, his hair in disarray and a feverish look in his eyes. Nevertheless, he gave them a weak but bright smile when he saw them.

  
“Vox Machina! Aren’t you a sight for sore eyes! How was Ank’Harel?” Gilmore’s tone was jovial but his voice was raspy and quiet. It was very clear to them that recent days taken even more of a toll on him than the last time they’d seen him. Vax doubted he could walk. They walked into the sitting room, perching on various pieces of furniture. Vax leaned on the arm of Gilmore’s chair.

  
“Ank’Harel presented its fair share of challenges, but it wasn’t anything we couldn’t handle,” Vax answered him. “We met your parents.” Gilmore tilted his head back to look at him.

  
“Are they well?”

  
“They are. They’re very proud of you, you know.” Vax paused a moment, deliberating, before adding, “We’re very proud of you, too.” Shaun let out a self-deprecating huff of laughter.

  
“You all are the ones going out there and saving the world. I’m afraid I’m pretty much useless as I am now.” Vex stood from her spot on the couch and leaned on the other arm of Shaun’s chair, gently squeezing his hand.

  
“Nonsense, darling. You’ve been holding an experimental magical barrier over an entire town for weeks by yourself now. What we’ve been doing pales in comparison. You shouldn’t be so hard on yourself.”

  
“Allura is back, now,” Vax informed him. “You can take a break. She said she could take over for a while. You don’t have to bear this all alone anymore, Shaun.”

  
“Well, that’s a relief, then,” Gilmore sighed. “Now that you mention it, I can feel her magic contributing again.”

  
“Relax, Shaun. Let us take care of you for a while.” A conflicted look flashed in Gilmore’s eyes.

“You don’t have to do that. I think I’ll just go to bed, actually” Gilmore made to get up, shaking with exhaustion and stumbled the second he got to his feet. Vax grabbed his arm to help steady him.

“Alright, maybe you can help me get to the bed, then.” His tone was light, but his eyes contained a hint of vulnerability that Vax knew he hated to show. Gilmore was always a showman, letting the world see only his persona as the carefully put together, charismatic Glorious Gilmore. For the longest time, Vax had thought that the persona had been the real Gilmore, had been enamored with this confident, intelligent man who always knew exactly what to say. But the mask had slipped an inch when he had told Gilmore that their flirtations had to end, and he had seen just a hint of vulnerability, nearly indistinguishable if you weren’t looking for it. Then the dragons had attacked and Emon had crumbled and, with it, Shaun’s mask. He didn’t have the energy to keep people safe and still be Glorious Gilmore, so all that was left was Shaun, tired and struggling and just a little bit broken like the rest of them.

Vax gestured to Grog, who seemed to get his message. Before he could protest, Shaun was swept up into Grog’s arms, carried easily even though he was a sizeable man.

Shaun laughed nervously. “This is really unnecessary.” Grog continued to carry him anyway, pausing by the bed as Vex pulled back the covers and then placing him in it. “Alright, thank you everyone. I am plenty comfortable. I’m sure you have a lot you need to do, so I’ll stop taking up your time—“

“—Shaun,” Vax interrupted. “We have a few days before we have to go back to Draconia. We all care for you very much, you know, we want to look after you. I know that I’ve hurt your feelings—and don’t you dare deny it, I’ve been horribly inconsiderate—because I’ve spent so long sorting my shit out. I’ve hurt you, and I’m so sorry for it, but I think that we have everything sorted now, and we want you to know how important you are to us. If you really want us to leave, then we can, no hard feelings, but if you want us to stay, then we’ll be right here.”

“I… I thought you were with Keyleth?”

“I am,” Vax replied. “I’m also with Percy and Grog and Pike and Scanlan. We have a bit of an unconventional relationship, but I’ve never really been one for convention anyway.”

“Oh.”

“And we’d like to be here for you in whatever capacity you’ll have us.”

Gilmore thought back, remembering the first time he had seen this ragtag group. In all honestly, his first impression of them was that they would be an easy business transaction. Their loud, boisterous behavior, as well as the way they stared at the wares of his shop in wonder, indicated to him that they wouldn’t be clever enough to try to haggle. That assumption was quickly kicked to the curb when he met Vex’ahlia, whose shrewd business sense mirrored his own. He learned that, despite their ridiculous behavior, there was much more to them than met the eye.

First, he'd noticed Vax’ildan, both beautiful and clever. His quick wit and sly smile had enamored Gilmore almost immediately. Despite himself, Gilmore found himself slowly opening up to the half elf, allowing him into his heart in a way that hadn’t happened in years. Vax wasn’t the only one Gilmore admired, however. He enjoyed Keyleth’s genuine, eager curiosity, Pike’s gentle disposition, Scanlan’s absurd humor. Percival seemed to hold layers of complexity that Gilmore was sure he could never fully understand. He even admired Grog’s simple loyalty, a refreshing change from the tricks and underhanded tactics of most of his fellow merchants. While Vax had been the one to catch his eye, Shaun couldn’t deny that all of the members of Vox Machina were alluring in their own way. And he hadn’t been cared for in so long.

  
“Some tea would be nice, I suppose.” Vax’s soft, genuine smile made it worth the risk.

  
Keyleth brewed a pot of tea as Vax helped him sit up against his pillows. Percy and Vex went around the house, cleaning up dishes and clothing that he had grown too tired to clean up. Scanlan played a song on his shawm, more calming than anything he’d heard the bard play before. Pike, praying to her goddess, sent a wave of healing energy through his weary body, relaxing his tense muscles and soothing the pain in his head.

Keyleth returned with the tea, and a warm cup was placed in his hands. Vox Machina sat around his room, regaling him with stories of their adventures, clearly embellished, and when the tea was done and the cups put away, they settled down to sleep. The bed was large, but it would take some serious maneuvering to make them all fit on it, especially with a goliath in their company, so Percy and Vex split off to share the couch together. Grog pulled Shaun to his chest, a solid presence against his back. Keyleth slipped in front of him, face to face, throwing an arm across his waist right next to Grog’s. Vax lay behind her, his arm over her side so that he could hold Shaun’s hand. Pike and Scanlan were small enough to fit in the remaining space, Pike curled up around Grog’s head and Scanlan nestled between Keyleth and Shaun’s legs, remaining respectful despite his usual suggestive behavior.

Gilmore had shared a bed with many people over the years, but he hadn’t felt the security that he felt now since he was a child. People didn’t just give things for free, there was always an unspoken expectation of repayment. As a merchant, Gilmore understood that. Bed partners offered their company in exchange for pleasure. They would only stay so long as it was to ensure future pleasure. Now, though, Gilmore had nothing to give. The world had already taken everything he had to offer, but they were all still here, giving when he could not.

Shaun squeezed Vax’s hand just a little bit tighter and finally allowed himself to fall into a restful sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> So the beginning felt really rushed to me, but I felt pretty good about the character analysis in the middle/end so i wanted to post it anyway. I'm a fairly new writer but I'm doing my best. I also posted this on my [ tumblr](http://trinketchu.tumblr.com/) so feel free to talk to me there!


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